Tuesday, November 29, 2016

More Thoughts About My Sobriety And Cannabis

Last night at bedtime I tried a single bong hit of Purple FX and I slept like a dream! I woke up smiling and thanking the universe.

You know, it's taking me a long time to not only warm-up to using cannabis (off and on since 2011)(smoked a lot of pot in my youth though), but to learn and practice not being triggered to DRINK when I use it.... which is probably the biggest reason I don't use cannabis during the day or evening, and why it's taking me this long to even use it more often at bedtime.

Even during my 1 1/2 alcohol-free months between August and September, when I thought I had quit drinking for good, I'm wondering if using cannabis during the day triggered me to drink again. I mainly tried to teach myself to microdose. It was not the main trigger, but it may have been one. I have to train myself to love cannabis INSTEAD of booze. And I Will. It seems almost the only time I liked to use marijuana was when I was drinking, and I'd use it to get high and to help me stop drinking more.

I actually am feeling kind of creepy inside and a little nervous and sick as I write this. I have a lot of nervousness and some fear when I think about all these things, that is, when I think about drinking. I'm determined to remain alcohol-free for life, after all my starts and stops. Maybe NOW is MY TIME to be FREE.

Cannabis is SUCH a Miraculous Healing Medicine for SO MANY THINGS, and I will continue to learn more and more (resources in right margin). I love helping to educate and support others regarding cannabis use. Just think what toxic, harmful meds most people could get off of if they switched to Nature's Healing Plant! Not to mention how many people have gotten off alcohol because of THC/CBD!

I absolutely have NO interest in getting high at this juncture. I seek only to use cannabis as a healing tool.

I'm GLAD I'm not giving up on myself; teaching myself to prefer cannabis over beer and wine and champagne and tequila and vodka, and to never be triggered by cannabis to drink! THOUSANDS of people have done this! (Let's not forget about Stephen King!)

Monday, November 28, 2016

Regarding Me And Cannabis

So far since quitting alcohol I have only been interested in using cannabis three different times at bedtime to help me sleep. Done that sporadically not consecutively. Microdoses of either CBD/THC Candy Hearts, or a toke of Blue Dream.

Let's see, once I did a few licks of a Candy Heart plus a toke of Blue Dream; slept better. Once I did just a toke of Blue Dream; made me restless for an hour or so and won't do that again. Then last night I did only Candy Heart; it helped.

Today I bought some more Candy Hearts and some Purple FX to try.

This book is helpful, as are the classes through Learn Green Flower (link in right margin).


When the healing of my alcohol addiction happened, I also lost interest in getting high.... but that makes sense because I really only liked to get high when I was drinking. But I also, so far, have lost interest in using cannabis much at all, and never other than at bedtime.

I've been slowly warming up again to learning more about using cannabis medicinally without getting high. And in fact, the cannabis balm has proven to be a miracle healer for wounds and things! It helps my daughters' cramps too.

Anyway, just thought I'd post an update about me and cannabis.

I'm looking forward to learning much more about using it for healing. And, yes, I don't like to think about it, but there will come times when I want to drink, and microdosing with a Candy Heart will help get me through it. How I Wish I Would Never Want To Drink Again Though. Another step I've taken to help with that is to stop watching shows where there's drinking. And so of course that is almost every show in existence. What I noticed last time I quit drinking was that the glamorizing of  drinking booze played on me and played on me until I started erroneously thinking and believing that drinking was a good idea for me. SCARY SHIT!

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Liberals Needed Happy Thanksgivings This Year! And We Sure Had One! : )

We don't have the glitz, or the fancy dishes and deco, but we sho do have the LOVE! : )

Besides the yummy EATS, of course, my favorite part of the day was the laughter and the banter! : )

We watched the Macy's Parade and the National Dog Show, ATE, played a game, watched The Iron Giant, and played with the cat brothers!

I Love You Richard, Anna, and Bethany, and Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn!

Monday, November 21, 2016

Now It's Up To Me

Angels are relatively new to my understanding. Three years ago I started learning about them, and so they came into my life. They are very real. They are our buddies whom we ought to speak to as friends. They Love Us Unconditionally! They are just waiting to help us! We have but to ask!

Now it's up to me to hold-on to the healing I received (per my last couple of posts)... like by saying "Thank You" in my heart to Matt and the angels a lot! You know what I mean? Remembering to live in gratitude, as a rule, as much as possible! 

These angel wings jumped out at me at Michael's the other day, when my family and I were joyfully shopping for our annual one-ornament-each for the Christmas tree next month. It was the only ornament of its kind left on the rack! There it was, just for me! I will look at my angel wings hovering above my bed (My Throne, where I mostly live) every time I think about drinking. (I see green energy in the first pic, taken at night. Archangel Raphael?!) : )

Sunday, November 20, 2016

My Angelic Healing From Alcohol Abuse (bears repeating!)

From Monday 11/14/16 Angel Academy 7 class, call 2
I bravely entered a question online saying something about that I was drunk and wondering about if I was an alcoholic, and if it was affecting my ability to receive this lesson..... and to my great wonderment, Julie seems to have seen me and immediately presented it to Matt.

Needless to say, I woke up Tuesday morning feeling as if I'd received a healing and I QUIT DRINKING. (I'd felt that alcohol was the only way I could cope with the political stress, among other things.) What is doubly remarkable is that I was so desperate for help to stop, I had been seriously considering going back to CultAA -- which I vowed never to return to almost 10 years ago because it did me more harm than good all those decades I was in and out of it. Mercifully, and I do mean mercifully!, for me, unbeknownst to him, Matt also cut the cord between me and that toxic old paradigm for good, I believe; in my perception! So, I received a double healing! I Felt FREE! And so far I still do! I transcribed this from the recording:

Julie:   ....If we can face things head-on and not having to get lost in the drugs and alcohol....forms of escapism... to not look at it because it's too painful, and too hard to feel and go through..... Cuz we're all in this together.

Matt: Yes, because of the multidimensional nature of this transmission, and because we are showing respect to the Akashic Records and the universe in the work that we do, I always advise everyone when we participate in these calls.... and watching the videos....to be free of all influences, all drugs ---- alcohol. Because when you're on something, even when you're part of this kind of experience, your subconscious mind is still taking in the healing energy... but it's kind of held in a cosmic bank account until your body sobers up out of the intoxicants.

So, it's not like things get in the way of this transmission, I'm not speaking superstitiously .....it just delays the progress and healing that can occur right now when we are artificially altered. So my best advice to YOU, anyone on this call, and especially throughout your life, and I'll even say this just to broaden this.... because we're living in accelerated times, because we're literally already in the gravitational acceleration of ascension... now is the perfect time to be as healthy, alkaline, and as SOBER AS POSSIBLE.

......It's one thing in history when souls are like 'wow, we have so much time before we get into that trajectory....we have so much incubation time where we can just check-out'...and I understand why a lot of people do check-out because on a soul level being intoxicated on drugs or alcohol is kind of on a very unconscious level giving the soul the remembrance and the taste of what your energy is going to feel like in the future.

But we're not in a position of waiting for the future. We're actually in the acceleration of becoming and manifesting that future. So, in order for us to really allow the things we've always wanted, which is the full embodiment of our divinity, and to bring that divinity to life, and to manifest the most miraculous environments and possibilities for all of us to enjoy together as one, my invitation to you is: Now is the time in life to get as healthy as possible, as alkaline as possible, and to be as SOBER as possible.




Because this is the time in history where this reality is such fertile ground for your highest expansion and evolution, that you wouldn't want to be altered, and to miss being fully present; For Any Second Of This.

This is not just the lifetime we've all incarnated and waited for, this is the TIME in incarnation we've been waiting for. And the reason everyone either felt chaos or excitement when the election happened? .......it represented the changing of the guard.... not politically....a changing of the guard vibrationally. And we start to feel like 'My God, this is the time I came to be really alive, this is the time I really came for' --- even if you don't know what you're feeling.

So this is the time when we would honor, reverence, and respect that this is where everything accelerates and conspires in our highest favor. And in order to accept those gifts that life has been waiting so long to give you? We have to meet life in our clearest, most mindful, most respectful......AND MOST SOBER.....self. That's how life knows you're ready. And anything that would arise as a result of that? On behalf of the Akashic records, it is truly my honor, and Julie's honor, to be with you, and to serve the evolution of your journey, with compassion, miraculous grace, and heart-centered joy.

Julie: And a reminder to love what arises..... love the you who experiences that.


Saturday, November 19, 2016

Poem From Fellow ME/CFS Sufferer

Phyllis is my long-time friend from Canada and is challenged with a much more severe case of the disease than I am. Her words dynamically capture what nearly 95% of ME/CFS patients live with.

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Poem- To the pain, and no farther.

Another day up and down again.

Another day up
Another day down
Another day a yo-yo.

Get up and moving
Get a sharp pain stab
Get down and stop.

Oh, no,
Please body-
Not Again!

More time down than standing up
More time sitting than moving about
More time with feet than feet down
More time stuck in one spot.

When the legs won't work the legs don't work
When the knees won't bend the knees don't bend
When the back won't twist the body can't turn
When the feet give out you can't walk about
When the wrists stab and twist
When the hand don't hold
When breathe stealing pains take hold
When the body says "Stop" and "Fold"

The won't power of the body wins.

So it's up for a bit
Until the pain grabs hold
Then back down again
Wait it out
Until it eases
Then up for a bit again

The willpower of the mind
The patience of the spirit
Little by little
Work around, smarter
Work to the pain- no further

Another day up and down again
Another day like so many
Another day doing what I can
To the pain, and no farther.

To the pain, and no farther.

~ (c) Phyllis Griffiths, 2016

Friday, November 18, 2016

Note To Self: I'm So Proud Of Me Right Now

Given my life-situation of having to live in bed (My Throne) for 20+ hours a day for the past 19 years, I'm NOT overusing Internet, Social Media, Smart Phone, Sugar, TV (well, maybe a little), cannabis ...... only alcohol........ and that's healed and gone now; no mo booze! I eat as healthy as I can and take supps. I don't take meds.

If I could spend more time in gratitude, and in feeling good about myself, life would feel better!

We all deserve this! We all deserve more love not less! (Thanks, Matt Kahn!)

I notice that I get high-strung on a dime. The littlest things stress me out internally to the max, like when Blogger acts up, or my DVR does. Wow. That's a horrible thing to do to myself.

I have a new mantra, "STOP AND BREATHE" when I catch myself getting crazy-in-the-head over nothing. Then when I simply STOP whatever it is I'm doing and focus on my breathing for even a moment ---- MiracleMagic happens!

It's easy to get strung-out-stressed being on the Internet for an extended period, like when I created this blog.

It's even easier to get strung-out-stressed watching the news, and I only watch MSNBC (Rachel, Lawrence, and Brian), Real Time, and Last Week Tonight.


Thursday, November 17, 2016

Welcome, My Last Blog Ever!

I'm very glad to be here.

May continued healing and growth take place here for myself and my readers.