Sunday, April 2, 2017

Oy Vey! At First I Thought Google Had Betrayed Me - But It Was My Own Self Wot Did! - And Now I Have To Let This Blog Go Too!!

I googled myself to see if something I'd posted elsewhere was going to appear in the Google search that I didn't want to appear there. What I discovered was that this blog, this I thought carefully protected from the public blog, appeared in the search under my name.

What the what?!, I thought. How could this happen?! My blog is not registered under my name or my main email address! I immediately blamed google, of course. But then I saw it! There in my blog profile! My full name!!! AAAACK!!!! It was an uneducated mistake on my part! And to think that it's been like this since the beginning!

This means that ONCE AGAIN, I DO NOT HAVE PRIVACY FROM MY FOO, AND THAT ONCE AGAIN THEY HAVE ACCESS TO MY BLOG AND HAVE BEEN READING THINGS I WOULD NOT WANT THEM TO READ!
And please know that my ex-sister, the spy, will have definitely found it.

I'm feeling so exposed.
And vulnerable.
And sad.
And sorry.
And stupid.
And even a bit violated.
And very disappointed.
And very stressed-out.

It's only been less than a year since I permanently orphaned myself from them out of necessity for my health, sanity, happiness, and freedom.

I thought I was finally safe from them---because I finally had gotten them to stop contacting us---and I thought I was finally free to be the blogger that I want to be: To just be myself and to be able to write my heart and soul. And to grow in talent and substance as a blogger and writer. And to grow as a person who is becoming her true self at long last.

What a shocker that I have to kiss a fifth blog goodbye due to those unfortunate people.


Oh Well! I find that I'm not overly broken-up about it. First of all, a spiritual practice of mine is to not get attached to things. Secondly, I can create a "real" last blog if I want to, and this time I won't make any mistakes in revealing it to anyone I don't want it revealed to.

I apologize to my subscribers. I have no way of knowing who you are or how to reach you to let you know if I create a new blog, unless we're friends on Facebook or elsewhere.

Dr. Smith Says It Well!


..."Oh the pain of it all!"

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Doctor Visit -- First In Over A Year -- Told Her About My Alcoholism

Well, it makes sense to blog about my sobriety now and then on this blog!
May It Inspire Others

First of all, now that I'm 60, I've decided to give western medicine another chance, trust my newish doctor, and go see her more often. After all, there's a list of things to get checked-out by now.

Dr. Wolinski, DO, has already shown me she is teachable and validating about ME/CFS, unlike any other primary care physician I have tried over two decades. She eagerly borrowed my DVD, Forgotten Plague (link in right margin. video available on amazon prime), which made me feel really good and cared about. My biological dentist, Dr. Yoo, watched it last year, the dear soul that he is, and he said it helped him very much to understand my situation before doing my grueling bridge work.

It felt really good and right telling Dr. W. about my drinking history. She was very surprised. She was so darn supportive and non-judgmental and readily agreed to keep it out of my medical records.

There are no words to describe how grateful I am for that miraculous healing I got in November that freed me from the clutches of my decades-long on-again-off-again torrid love affair with alcohol.
When I think about what I was doing to my already very ill body, including sucking up probably ALL the vitamin B12, which I'm already depleted of due to a thing called MTHFR Mutation, which is separate from the ME/CFS or the Hashimotos Thyroiditis----anyway, when I think "How could I have done that to myself? Drunk alcohol like I did??" The only answer is "Because you're an alcoholic and drinking made you feel normal."

So, I'm celebrating all this sobriety, the few slips I had (12/8, 12/9, 2/24) to me were part of my recovery process. That last fairly recent one really showed me how different I am now because I hated every moment of it, even that initial buzz that drinkers live for. And the secret truth is, that when I chose to buy some beer I was telling myself I could drink once a month just to feel normal and no one would be the wiser. THANK GODGODDESSUNIVERSE THAT DID NOT TAKE HOLD!!!




Sunday, March 26, 2017

40 Reasons Why I Write (Challenge)


http://positivewriter.com/reasons-why-write-challenge/








1) I write because every time I do, no matter what I write or whom I'm writing to, I feel connected to my muse/my twin soul!

2) - 40)   "           "              "

Well, OK, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but honestly? Not much of one! Not much of one AT ALL!

Friday, March 17, 2017

Divine Union - The Love Story of Jesus and Mary Magdalene

What may have happened at the crucifixion (I've heard this from other sources as well), that Jesus didn't die on the cross and why and how Mother Mary, Mary Magdalene, and Elizabeth helped him survive, that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married twin souls, that more and more twin souls are reuniting in the present time to fulfill a mission....

 

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

What SHE Says


Beloved Anah Maa. TRUTH. Wake Up!



Personally, I won't go so far as to give up media, but I do take frequent breaks from TV and Internet and SmartPhone. And I pay close attention to how I feel in my body. If I start to feel stressed in any way, or my thoughts spiral into negativity, it's definitely time to get out of the matrix for a while, go within, find peace and love and joy in my heart and breath.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Post-RainRainRain At Mission Trails! Gorgeous!


 Brand New Crack:
Someone's Dog Loves The New Stream Too:
 Whoa! Poor Tree!:
 Never Too Young To Appreciate MT!: